Reason #1: Not enough emotional intelligence
- Unfortunately, many of the people we know have failed at relationships, so we don’t have as many great examples to model after as we need.
- In most marriages, it only takes six months for one to look at the other and say, “I wish I would have never married you!”
- Emotional Intelligence: example of mother
- Getting to know your spouse better is a lifelong process. Fondness + Admiration + Appreciation
Reason #2: Lack of depending on God to enable us to love
- No wonder the biblical term for sexual love is to “know.”
- A godly marriage is like a triangle. 1 + 1 + 1 = 1.
- Why do we need God? There’s plenty of love without God… for myself.
Ephesians 4:1-3 CEB
Therefore, as a prisoner for the Lord, I encourage you to live as people worthy of the call you received from God. Conduct yourselves with all humility, gentleness, and patience. Accept each other with love, and make an effort to preserve the unity of the Spirit with the peace that ties you together.
Reason #3: Not making friendship the heart of the relationship
- A marriage that includes God isn’t a one-time deal; it is a daily surrender. You want a real definition of marriage? It’s gonna be a lot of dying to self, throughout the day.
- Is there a more important person than your spouse for you to follow all of the biblical mandates to show love to??
- Betrayal is any act or life choice that doesn’t prioritize the commitment and put the partner “before all others.”
Reason #4: Making your feelings the priority of the marriage
- A marriage that includes God is a place where you lose yourself—not necessarily in the dreams and ambitions of your spouse, but rather in the dreams and direction of a trustworthy Father.
- Key question: What’s the life God wants for your spouse?
- God takes weeping that has lasted all night and somehow turns it into a joyful morning of rejoicing
He takes ashes—the final, worthless thing that remains when everything has burned to the ground—and produces something beautiful
He transforms death into life. This is not just a metaphor; this is literally what God does